He was born on September 18th. He was a perfect 6lbs 8 oz and 18 inches. I was pretty shocked at his small size, since my older boys were well over 8lbs. There were 2 knots in his umbilical cord, which was the talk of the OR for a few minutes. I was too caught up in the moment to pay attention to the chatter going on. But we were told more than once that we were lucky to be holding him, as knots can cause some serious complications. I had my tubes tied while they were cleaning him up, which my doctor informed me was a good thing because my uterus was so thin he could see through it. Having my tubes tied was a decision I wrestled a little bit with. I worried I would regret it, but I feel very confident in that decision now knowing another pregnancy would be risky. I had such high hopes of breastfeeding this little guy. But after attempting to breastfeed my other boys and failing, I knew there was a chance it wouldn't happen. But none the less, I proclaimed to the doctors and nurses that I was breastfeeding. So when he was born we did the whole skin to skin thing in the Operating Room. Which I did not get to do with my other boys, and it was amazing. I loved being able to touch him and feel him when he was just minutes old. Once I was moved into recovery we got right down to nursing. He latched right on and we were doing great. He wanted to eat pretty often and I was tolerating it well. I had horrible pain with my others, but not with Warren. Friday evening I mentioned to the nurses that he was wanting to nurse ALL.THE.TIME. Like I could not put the boy down. I also noticed that I was not able to express any colostrum like I had before. The nurse assured me that he was getting all that he needed. So I let him nurse as much as he wanted. As the evening went on we noticed that he became very jittery. After his circumcision the pediatrician came in and told us that his sugar had dipped down into the 40s, which was 'borderline'. She wanted to keep checking it throughout the night. It didn't seem like a huge deal, so we nursed on. After a couple more sugar tests we were informed that his sugar was not coming up at all. I had told the night nurse my concerns with not getting any colostrum out, and she said he is getting it out even if I wasn't. But after 3 failed glucose tests the pediatrician said to start supplementing. So I started feeding him with a syringe first then I would let him nurse. The supplementing seemed to be working. So Saturday we were told that we would most likely get to go home. We were hoping to be discharged around 2pm. But Warren became very jittery and his sugar dropped to 34. 3 different pediatricians came to talk to me in a span of about 15 minutes.
They all wanted keep an eye on his sugar. But before they even got a chance to check it again we were visited again and told that they were moving him to NICU so they could figure out what was going on. Of course, I kind of lost it at that point. I was a hot mess. Dustin wasn't even in the room when I fell apart. I had to call him to come back to the room. We walked with the nurse as she wheeled our little boy up to the NICU and I sat in a chair while the team worked to try and get an IV in. I was asked several times if I wanted to come back later once they had it in. But I was pretty insistent that I was staying with my baby. Every vein they tried failed. After what seemed like an eternity they finally got an IV going in his head. By this point every bit of my pain meds had worn off. I was alone up in NICU at this point. I had stayed as long as I could because of my pain. I somehow walked back to my room, but I was hunched over by the time I made it to the nurses station and asked for my medicine. I collapsed into my bed and cried. I hated being in that empty room. It was too quiet. After I rested and ate dinner we went back up to NICU to see how Warren was doing. The nurse told us what all was being done for him. He was severely dehydrated and his sugar was slowly coming up. They had put him on a high calorie formula and started him off at 30cc's. I wasn't able to nurse him because they wanted to keep track of how much he was getting for his glucose tests. So I was told to pump every 2-3 hours. I stayed and held him for a long time. I finally went back to my room for the night. I didn't like it. But I got some much needed sleep. When we went back the next morning we were told that his sugar was staying in the 80s and he was doing much better. We were moved to a transition room later on Sunday evening and we were discharged on Monday around 12. I was still wanting to breastfeed but at this point I was mostly pumping so we could make sure he was getting enough. But my milk had not fully came in so he was still just getting formula. I was getting less than half an oz of breast milk from pumping. I was just excited to see any milk to be honest. I never had milk with my oldest and with my 2nd I got sick after having him and my milk dried up really quickly. So once the pediatrician gave me the OK to try breastfeeding again we were back at it. I quickly found out that I was not producing enough for him. He was not satisfied after nursing for what seemed like forever. I was having to give him a bottle after he nursed. I read online how to increase my supply. The next 4 weeks were insane. I tried everything. Fenugreek, Mothers Milk Tea, Fennel Oil, Reglan, More Milk Plus....Power Pumping. You name it I probably tried it. At 5 weeks PP I was only able to pump 2 oz at the most and that was only if I didn't nurse him. If he nursed I wasn't able to get any extra out. I had started just pumping and giving him formula and breast milk. Pumping had taken over. I spent more time with the pump than I did with my family. When I realized how much time I was spending attached to a pump I decided to just stop. I have been grieving giving up the whole breastfeeding thing for a few weeks. I had really high hopes this time, as I knew it was my last time to try. But I am finally getting out of this funk and moving forward.
Aside from the failure of breastfeeding, things have gone really really well. He is a very chill baby. He does like for me to hold him and just stare at him. I try to soak every bit of him in as I know that this stage does not last long at all. His big brothers are crazy about him and he is just such a wonderful little addition to our family.
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